For everysecondtuesday, whom I understand has been recently feeling rather under the weather. It's not your Sweet Charity fic, but it is Ruby! Religious Ruby, at that, and actually the converse to an earlier Castiel fanmix.

Oh God this is so tl;dr.

CASEY: Some demons lie. But some are true believers.
DEAN: Believers in what?
CASEY: You think humans have an exclusive on a higher power?
DEAN: You have a god?
CASEY: Sure. His name's Lucifer.

RUBY: I know it's hard to see it now... but this is a miracle. So long coming.

We first see the concept of demon religion in the third-season episode Sin City, when Dean meets the demon Casey, who is, as she puts it, a "true believer". Not much is said of it, and then we get Ruby, a seemingly benevolent demon who goads Sam into drinking demon blood in order to develop his Antichrist powers - which, in all fairness, didn't take much convincing on Ruby's part. Until the fourth-season finale we don't get an explanation for why she is helping Hunters - her natural enemies - out, though it's implied that Ruby may or may not be in love with Sam.

However, in the events of Lucifer Rising, we learn that Ruby is also a "true believer", and has manipulated the brothers and the situation in order to set her god free. In order to do so, she clawed herself up from hell; killed her fellow demons; brought to light the only human-wielded weapon that could kill them (and herself); was beaten up; was thrown back into hell and tortured for an indeterminate amount of time - the equivalent of a few above-ground weeks, at least - until Lilith trusted her enough to send her back above-ground; killed her kin again; ceded to humans; ceded to angels; was tortured again; hid her intentions and faith so thoroughly that the other demons thought she was a traitor to everything she was; and risked her life over and over again, nearly dying at the hands of demons, angels, and both Winchesters.

That is some impressive devotion. There are saints that put themselves through less than that.

It also makes for a quite fascinating character and raises some very interesting questions - just what is demon religion? How does it make sense of the world? Does it have guidelines, things that pious demons are supposed to do? A priesthood? How do you worship something in a world ruled by practical magic? - that I would have loved if they explored further, but, predictably enough, were never answered by Kripke et al. The closest we get is Ruby's self-congratulatory speech after Lilith's death - which seems less like boasting and more like a spontaneous outburst of joy and secrets kept too long. In it, she calls Lucifer's rising a "miracle" - which could either be a) the closest English word to what a demon would call it in their own language (do they have a language?), the closest way to get Sam to understand her, or b) that again, there's more to this demon faith than entrails and sulfur - and implies that this was her goal all along.

Based on this, it's probably fair to say that almost every decision she made throughout the series was calculated to bring her god freedom and herself closer to him - and maybe there were unseen complications, like her affection (love?) for Sam, but the principal remains the same. Everything is driven by it. In many ways, the story of Ruby is the story of her faith - a perversely religious saga comparable to any of the stories of the opposition (i.e. the Christian God/YHWH).

In short, it's a side of Ruby that doesn't often get play. (Of course, I'd settle for play of any side that's not "evil bitch getting in-between the Winchesters!!!!1!") So I made a fanmix about it.

{ Also, a note probably worth putting down: I'm not advocating Satan worship, or trying for blasphemy, or insulting Christianity or people of faith. All of this is theoretical, within the context of a television show about two good-looking brothers driving around America and having homoerotic adventures with the Judeo-Christian pantheon. In short, fiction. So please don't flame. }




( In the burning fuselage of my days, let my mouth be ever fresh with praise. )

Confession time: I liked Barbara. Gruff, but kind of affectionate, rather like Mad-Eye Moody; I'm not usually into het ships, but I'd be quite content if she and Lassie became an item. They seem... okay for each other, if both would loosen up. And even though it was played off as a joke, I think it's cool that Lassie fell for this sturdy, middle-aged woman with the androgynous haircut. Go unusual tastes!

More than anything else, though, I think this week's Psych has cinched my opinion that Lassiter was made for dom/sub relationships. Or, perhaps, dom/sub relationships were made for Lassiter. Has anyone noticed that when romance comes into the fore, Lassie always seems to be the submissive partner? Though in his work he's so much of a leader to the point that it becomes obnoxious, he seems to be highly attracted to bossy, slightly (or more-than-slightly) masculine people who immediately take charge. (The exception would be Emilina, whom you could argue WOULD be commanding had her brain not been melted by drain cleaner.) It's an interesting contrast to Shawn, who tends to lean towards clever, pretty girls, the ones with glossy waves and fitted jackets.

...Damn. Now that we've met the Shawn-mother and Gus' parents - hell, even Vick's sister - I think it's time we meet Lassie's ex-wife. I am starting to harbor suspicions that she is awesome.




( somewhere just beyond my reach, there's someone reaching back for me )

1. Maybe it was the crappy quality on YouTube, or maybe I'm just missing something, but I for one was not so wildly thrilled about Journey's End. Despite some clear attempts at humor, it mostly felt like one plot device after another, quantity over quality. I suppose that with the set-up that The Stolen Earth left them with, it was a question of wrapping up a lot of threads with cheap thread (the type that breaks too hard), or tying off some with the really high-quality polyester stuff. Couldn't afford both, of course. And the Beeb is nothing but economical.

2. See? I am good at procrastination and posting my stuff all at the same time.

Before we begin, though, a quick note about the linkage of this fanmix: Normally, when I make fanmixes, I post links for each individual song, because I know that sometimes, people are just here for the music and couldn't give a damn about my fannish leanings. Then, too, are some who share my fandoms and do care about the music, but don't need another copy of "Wonderwall", or just really, really don't like Portishead. And all of this is perfectly fine, because music is music, and even if it doesn't touch you one way it will, eventually, in another.

This mix, however, is not a collection of separate songs. Like most things, it started out as something else: a Doctor fanmix. But then there was Rose, and just when I'd finished with them, a song would come screaming "Master!". Which got me thinking, really, about the usual limitations of fanmixes, their structure. Unlike fics, they're usually centered around one character, one show, one pairing, and it's good, but not real. People don't fall in love just once, and, at the risk of sounding like a Girl Scout friendship song, love doesn't detract from itself. So I tried to do something different. This mix is a love story, not two.

Which brings me back to my original point: that this mix is meant to be treated as a whole, in the order I put them in, no songs left out. This, to me, is the story of Rose and the Doctor, the Doctor and the Master, the ones he loves but loses. As well as the titles and order of the songs, here is significance, too, in the instruments. Songs for the Doctor are string quartets, or cellos: deep, resonating, layered. Rose I envisioned as the lighter, though no less beautiful, piano (with a bit of Reinette thrown in there as well); the Master, of course, is represented by drums.

...I ramble muchly. SORRY, PEOPLE, SORRY.


( in which there is zoe keating, tori amos, bear mccreary and other fun stuff )

1. Graggh. I need to finish all these fic-fragments on my computer before it sizzles and dies (or I do). Must... summon... motivation...

2. The literary cycle is weird. I hated the Narnia books when I was younger (along with Tolkien and Twain and almost every other classic writer), but having recently re-watched Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian, I want fic. Fic about a movie based on a book that I would never read.

Hmm.

...In any case, Caspian recs. Got any?

3. Warning: this fanmix really doesn't make sense, and is in no way consistant. (Which is sort of on par for my stuff.) But here it is regardless - because, come on. The boys need love too.



( are you a hunter just like me? a lot of heart, a little crazy )

I shrink to admit it, but once I got over the... er, blondeness, I did end up liking Jenny the Knock-Off Time Lady. Why? Who knows. It certainly wasn't her perpetually overexcited demeaner, or her "Toxic" routine, or jail-escaping skills, or the rather questionable fact that she was born wearing eyeliner. To be completely honest, her most appealing factor was probably the way that the other characters played off of her. For instance, the Donna-Jenny dynamic. We had all expected the Doctor-Jenny thing to be going on, and it was great (from Tennant's side, anyway), but I for one did not anticipate Donna doing the maternal and actually making it... nice. I aw'd.




( you can't say goodbye, we never really met... you just burnt my bed and tore out the stars and kissed my forehead )

Yesterday I decided to clean out the attic. I'm not sure why, exactly; it seemed like a good idea at the time, but then again, these things usually do. And while I got rid of a lot of stuff, I also made a vacuum-cleaner bag explode & shower everything with mouse crap, banged my newly pierced ear on a doorframe, broke two china plates and got stuck in a bin.

And that was just the first hour.

The point of all this, though, is that afterwards I was listening to music and thinking certain... fannish thoughts... So in honor of fuck all, I started work on a bunch of DW/TW fanmixes, which seem to mostly feature obscure Torchwood-femslash pairings (read: Suzie/Gwen) and the Year That Never Was.

...I fear I may be growing certifiable.

Also, to my knowledge the "dark between the bedposts" title is originally mine, but it sounded vaguely familiar in that heard-it-in-a-dream-or-fic context, so if I've accidently ganked anything of anyone's, let me know. (Knowing my track record, it's an unhappy possibility.)




( i'm the glass you break to touch, but you never want me much )